Some people have social confidence to spare. It’s easy to see that some children are seemingly born with great social confidence, while others are not. Social confidence seems to come and go for most adults.

A serious lack of social confidence can lead to isolation and stifle career growth. If there’s one part of your life in which it pays to be confident, it’s in your social interactions.

Use these strategies to increase your social confidence and feel comfortable in all social situations:

Cynthia Lee, Certified Confidence Coach
  1. Practice. Every person that crosses your path is a practice partner for your social skills. The more practice you get, the better you’ll become at interacting with others. The better you become, the more confident you’ll feel. There are all kinds of things you can practice:
    • Eye contact
    • Small talk
    • Non-verbal communication
    • Telling jokes
    • And more
  2. Rehearse. Imagine yourself being successful socially. Before you head into a social situation, rehearse in your mind. See yourself being confident and competent. Imagine others responding to you in a positive way. In time, you’ll learn to feel the same way out in the real world.
  3. Adopt an effective attitude. It’s not a matter of life and death. No one is judging you or spending any of their time thinking about you. In fact, they’re probably wondering what you’re thinking about them.
    • Interacting with people in a social context should be fun and pleasant. Have a reasonable perspective on the situation.
  4. Focus on self-development. When you feel better about yourself, you’ll be more socially confident. Whether that means getting in shape, learning a new skill, or meditation, any enhancements you make will leave you feeling more confident.
  5. Learn. Learn about communication. Pick one area, such as nonverbal communication, and become an expert. Then, get out and practice. When you’ve mastered that, pick a new area to learn about. The more you know, the better you’ll become. That leads to real confidence.
  6. Avoid the need to be perfect. You don’t have to be perfect, or the funniest person at the party, and you don’t have to be the most charming person in the bar. Perfection is an unreasonable goal that leads to anxiety and a lack of confidence.
  7. Join a social group. You know a group of people that hang out together. It might be at work. It might be a friend that has a separate group of friends. See if you can join, too. Finding the right group of people can boost your social confidence.
    • Perhaps you already have a group of friends. Spend more time with them. Or, you might form your own group and become the social director!
  8. Combine social events with activities you’™re good at. Are you a great softball player? Join a softball league. Are you an expert at riding a motorcycle? Join a motorcycle club. Find an activity you excel at and turn it into a social activity.
    • Make a list of everything you do better than the average person. Now, find a way to do that in a group setting. You might join a band, a chess club, or a group that square dances on the weekend.

Think about how much your life would change if you were more socially confident. How would it impact your career? How would your social life be affected?

It’s hard to think of any potential downside to having greater social confidence. If you weren’t lucky enough to be born with perpetual confidence, you’ll want to grow and nurture this important attribute.

6 Ways to Raise Your Confidence in Social Situations

One of the keys to making a good impression, getting a great job, and enjoying life is social confidence. Unless you’re going to lock yourself in a cabin in the woods, it’s important to be able to interact confidently with others.

You may not have been born with the gift of gab, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be a charming and confident communicator.

You may have convinced yourself that you like spending time alone with Netflix or a good book, and that might be true to a point. Admit it, you wish you enjoyed spending time with others more than you currently do.

You can make this change.

Try these strategies to be more confident in social situations:

  1. Learn to relax instead of stressing yourself. Being anxious is something you do to yourself. You can do something else to yourself and be relaxed instead. Rather than thinking about an upcoming social situation in a negative way, imagine a positive outcome. You can affect your emotions with your thoughts. Use that to your advantage.
  2. Be willing to show your flaws. You can easily find the flaws in all the people you know. You still love many of them. There are plenty of people that love you, even if they know just how flawed you really are. If you’re not trying to present an image of perfection, you’ll feel much more relaxed.
  3. Enhance your social skills. When you’re an expert on something, you naturally feel more confident using that skill. Social skills are learnable, and there’s plenty of information out there you can use to teach yourself better social skills.
  4. Practice. The best time to work on your social skills isn’t at the company holiday party or when you’re on a first date. Practice in more mundane situations. The world is full of people. Think of them as test fodder in your quest to be more socially confident. Have a chat with your neighbor or a stranger at the gym.
    • It’s important to master your social skills and confidence in lower stress situations if you want them available in higher stress situations. Practice makes perfect.
  5. Stay grounded. While you’re communicating with others, stay out of your head. The easiest way to do this is to focus all of your attention on the other person. Look at them and listen intently. If you’re focusing on them, you can’t be thinking negative thoughts.
    • What if you are in a social situation, but not currently communicating with anyone? Try keeping your attention on your surroundings. Find the tallest person in the room. Notice the color of the walls. Stay aware of your environment and out of your head.
  6. Keep the attention off yourself while communicating. Why are you stressed in the first place? You’re probably worried about what everyone is thinking about you. Turn the tables and keep the attention on someone else.
    • Ask a lot of questions and you’ll keep the focus on the other person. Most people love to talk about themselves. You won’t have to do much and you’ll make a great impression.

Increasing your social confidence can do more to enhance your life than just about anything else you can do. It can be the road to less loneliness, a better career, more friends, more fun, and a richer life in general.

Unfortunately, those with social anxiety have learned to avoid social situations. You’ll have to be brave to teach yourself to be more socially confident. Start slowly, but get started today.

Everything becomes easier when you’re brimming with self-confidence. As soon as self-doubt enters your mind, your ability to act is compromised. Self-confidence might seem to rise and fall in a random fashion, but there are steps you can take to increase the level of confidence you experience on a regular basis. So here are: 

8 activities that you can put in place now to build your self-confidence

Enhance your self-confidence and accomplish more with these techniques:

  1. Achieve a goal. Start small. Your goal might be to arrive to work on time every day this week or to eat a piece of fruit each day. Easy goals are easy to accomplish. When you accomplish something, you feel more confident. Choose easy goals that make a difference. The accomplishment of many, small goals will change your level of confidence.
  2. Make a list of your accomplishments. It’s interesting that our failures are easy to list, but our accomplishments require a little more pondering. Make a list of your accomplishments and review them each day. Remember how great you felt in that moment.
  3. Groom yourself to a higher standard. Get a better haircut. Spend a little more time and attention on your grooming each morning. Learn how to apply your makeup more effectively. Trim your beard in a more attractive manner. Trim those stray ear and nose hairs. You’ll be surprised how much better you look and feel.
  4. Be assertive. Having more control over your life results in greater self-confidence. One of the quickest ways to increase the level of influence you have over your life is to be more assertive. Give yourself small tasks to accomplish that require assertiveness. A few examples you might consider:
  5. Achieve a goal. Start small. Your goal might be to arrive to work on time every day this week or to eat a piece of fruit each day. Easy goals are easy to accomplish. When you accomplish something, you feel more confident. Choose easy goals that make a difference. The accomplishment of many, small goals will change your level of confidence.
  6. Make a list of your accomplishments. It’s interesting that our failures are easy to list, but our accomplishments require a little more pondering. Make a list of your accomplishments and review them each day. Remember how great you felt in that moment.
  7. Groom yourself to a higher standard. Get a better haircut. Spend a little more time and attention on your grooming each morning. Learn how to apply your makeup more effectively. Trim your beard in a more attractive manner. Trim those stray ear and nose hairs. You’ll be surprised how much better you look and feel.

8. Be assertive. Having more control over your life results in greater self-confidence. One of the quickest ways to increase the level of influence you have over your life is to be more assertive. Give yourself small tasks to accomplish that require assertiveness. A few examples you might consider:

Some of us are blessed with a high level of self-confidence while others must learn to cultivate it. Focus on your accomplishments, be more assertive, and find a coach. Spend time each day growing your self-confidence and experience real personal growth.

Cynthia Lee

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About Cynthia Lee

Professional Blogger, Author, Wellness Mentor, Motivational Speaker, Army Veteran, Mother, Daughter, and Sister.

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